My mother used to say, if you are lucky, you would already be a mum. I think I have heard this since I was 16 years old? I reckon most of us girls would have heard the same thing from our parents. Come to think about it, this should not be the case. No girl should become a mum at such a young tender age. Of course our parents are just saying this to make us understand that we are old enough to take responsibility of our own actions.
As I hit the big “three-O” now, I look back and I begin to see the importance of education and an informed mind in the making of life’s decisions. Back to my younger days, I remember being angry with girlfriends who CHOSE to take the risk of having unprotected sex.
Luckily for them, they did not get pregnant. Or else, I wouldn’t know if I would need to accompany them to some sleazy dubious doctor to get an abortion or just watch them being grilled endlessly by their parents. I cannot imagine how traumatizing this would be for the girls and their families. Instead of enjoying their teen lives, they might be staying at home taking care of an infant when they can’t even take care of themselves.
Now this is not something new, statistics has shown us that about half of the teens do not use protection when having sex and on average, they start having sex at the age of 15. I find this rather unbelievable and preposterous how gullible and ignorant girls can be. Girls nowadays should be so much wiser and well-informed given the amount of sex education they get in school and the wide availability of resources in the internet on the dangers of unprotected sex.
Nowadays, there are even reality series and talk shows which focus on sexuality, sexually transmitted diseases and teen pregnancy. If only these shows were around much earlier (and possibly in Malaysia?), it might have prevented a lot more lives being “damaged” by the repercussions of unprotected sex.
One of the very shocking stories which I have seen is about a 16-year-old teen prostitute (from the Tyra Banks show). Victoria started prostitution at the startling age of 14 years. In the show, she was described as a bright girl from a middle class family. However, Victoria wasn’t satisfied with the pocket money which she was given and she resorted to quick money from prostitution. Eventually, she was also hooked with cocaine and she had to continue prostitution in order to get money for the drugs. Not surprisingly, she also contracted Chlamydia later, a type of sexually transmitted disease and felt horrible about it.
In America, there is another reality series called Teen Mom which features the lives of four teenagers and their first year of motherhood. In addition to teenage motherhood, it also shows the changing relationships with their family, friends, couples and school as a result of their pregnancy and early motherhood. Most importantly, the show focuses on the difficulties these four teenagers have to endure to raise their children. Maci Bookout, one of the featured teen mum in the show is a classic teenage overachiever who is not only smart and popular but she is attractive too. The reason she joined the show is because she wanted to share just how difficult it is to be a teen mum.
Would such cases be an indication that perhaps sex education in school is insufficient, hence calling for greater role played by parents in educating their children? Personally, I feel that the Malaysian school system can do better in improving its sex education syllabus. I remember learning about the anatomy of sexual organs and very briefly about contraception. My parent, on the other hand, never really taught me about the birds and bees.
I used to think that it’s always best to use condom as other contraceptive methods would be too much of a hassle. Perhaps I was just lazy in learning about them. Now that I am much older, I’m ashamed to say that I wish I had taken more initiative to learn more about the various contraceptive methods available or to just ask my doctor.
It was not until I stumble upon the Yes, I can campaign, that I manage to learn so much about oral contraception; i.e. the Pill. Well, the reason why I have not used it before is because I had the misconception that the pill will make me less fertile after I stop using them. How wrong was I! Yes, I know you will probably be laughing at me but I think I am not alone in believing this myth!
For example, I didn’t even know that the oral contraceptive pill could improve our skin condition and reduce the risk of ovarian cancer. As I was still a bit skeptical, I consulted my pharmacist friend and my doctor. Both assured me that that these are two possible beneficial effects of taking the pill.
So I guess I will be visiting my doctor soon to learn and try out a suitable oral contraceptive pill for me.
Elle Chin was our featured ambassador for the month of May 2011.